Tag Archives: surf

As an admittedly shit surfer, I harbour a [limited] empathy for kooks.

If you follow me on Twitter, you know that I know the horror of ending up right in someone’s projected track. I think we all do. To ensure that embarrassment entwines itself with guilt in that instance, the person whose wave you’ve bungled is sure to be utterly ripping, if not Joel Parkinson. That being said, I still can’t fathom the headspace of beginners who paddle out at Snapper and I’d like to think that none of my lineup f*ck-ups have caused anyone bodily harm. And that being said, it is so. hard. not to get a bit aggro when, amidst your late drop, you look down and realize (at the last second) that a man and his enormous longboard are caught up in the whitewater, only to skid off your board and join him in multiple sub-surface somersaults, resulting in an actual lump on your arm. When you find the air, he manages to be swept into you by the next wave (which is notably smaller), and this time, his fin slashes your leg. He goes, “That’s just my leg.” As in, “Don’t be alarmed; that thing you may have just kicked (HA) is my leg. Not a creature of the sea.” Yeah, cheers, bud!

Okay, enough whinging. Check out my story on ESPN today about the idea of paid webcast subscriptions. Many kind thanks in advance for your cooperation.

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Ketchup

A [lightly edited] excerpt from an email I sent yesterday at 2:15 p.m.:

Last night, I experienced the acute pain of a bluebottle sting. Ummm, my entire leg felt like it was on fire and swelling up, and the pain spread to my groin! How insane is that? Thinking that perhaps I was stung by an irukandji, or was having an allergic reaction to a regular, ol’ hombre de guerra (man o’ war), I called B____ in a panic.

“Is that normal?” I asked.

“Yeah, that sounds… pretty normal, yeah.”

He told me his mum’s remedy, “dating from approximately 1945,” was to apply vinegar, but that he preferred ice. I settled for a bag of frozen veggies. It did decrease the swelling. And made for a funny Instagram. (Well, I think it’s funny.)

Actually, it occurred to me that the laziest (yet perhaps most effective) way of bringing you up to speed is via photographs. So, I am storrowing an idea from the brilliant fellows over at Surfing mag: Here’s some of what I’ve been neglecting to tell you about in a handy gallery of recent Instagram photos:

If, inexplicably, you’re keen for more of my mundane misadventures and mediocre photography, find me: @casebut.

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Church.

Sunday morning at BR. Finally, a break in the “devil wind.” I manage to drag myself out of bed before dead high, even though I worked until a few hours ago. Every other stir-crazy surfer in the vicinity has the same idea. Some of them wear spring suits and tops, but they seem superfluous. (As usual.) Knee-high and pretty clean. We’ll take it.

Sunday morning at BR. Another lull in the horrendous wind that’s been blowing without fail for days. It pushes with such mighty force that it creates a wind swell on the creek. This morning, it is still. I manage to drag myself out of bed before dead high, even though I watched tele until a few hours ago. At first the sun seems benevolent, but after an hour, we realize that it’s got bite. Tan lines appear on already tanned, sunscreened skin. In 60 minutes or less. The water is cool and green. Which is better than cold and brown. Last week, the water was so brown, you couldn’t see your feet dangling below you. In an area that MSW calls “lonely and sharky,” this was not comforting. It didn’t help that sharks were apparently snapping birds from the sea’s surface in Byron. Today, thankfully, I can see my feet. There is a mini swell. Four foot. The sand’s not perfect. The crowd’s not perfect. Not perfect. But close. There are about 20 guys (and girls) in the lineup, which feels like a lot at a spot I’ve heard described as “still relatively undiscovered.” They’re all clumped at the one peak. I have much better luck down the beach with the other people who aren’t really interested in fighting over waves. I inevitably kook out once or twice: blow a takeoff, botch a turn. Fouls aside, I get some of the better waves I’ve had in a while. It’s amazing what surfing more months of the year does for your surfing. Anyway, clear-ish water, fun-sized waves, like-minded people.

Where would you rather be on a Sunday morning?

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Swoon: Taj’s Fiji Vignette 3/3

This is like the video version of an ice cream sunday. Or something less wholesome (but equally as delicious).

Vodpod videos no longer available.

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Aussie commercials are Super Bowl caliber, every day. Step it up, America.

A scheduling mix-up at work has given me the morning off. At first, I was annoyed that I woke up at 6 a.m. and rode my bike down there in the wind, only to ride it back 30 minutes later. But then I surfed for two hours and I wasn’t annoyed anymore. Funny how that happens. PLUS, tomorrow’s my birthday! For no reason, other than the fact that I’m now in a good mood and I feel like posting something, here’s my current favorite Aussie commercial:

Who’s got a good birthday surf vid I can use for tomorrow?! Send it ova!

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Circumnavigating Part 7: Making Like Magellan

Day two at Hanalei. Mike is exceptionally patient and encouraging, so I’m not sure what I’m hoping Alouette will do for me in the water, but I do have hopes of a better outcome than yesterday. I suppose on some level, I’m thinking that Alouette is a woman and, maybe, more my speed. Mike is a gristley guy with a lifetime of surf experience, ranging from New York winters to pumping Hanalei and beyond. I’m also hoping that the waves will be a size that I consider more fun than, say, deadly, since everyone keeps saying the swell’s going down.

Alouette turns out to be just as dauntless as Mike and just a little less nurturing (in the lineup). The swell is still up.

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Circumnavigating Part 6: So this is Hawaii.

Comfort zone: noun. The range of temperature between 28 and 30 degrees Celsius, at which the naked body neither sweats nor shivers.

Or, a situation or position in which a person feels secure, comfortable, or in control.

I once paddled out at San Clemente pier with Alex Haro, even though the swell was coming in and it was already bigger than what I would have braved on my own. On most days, SC pier is an easy break. A reasonable paddle, a little hollow, not too rough, clean. When there’s swell, though, the sets can be slightly intimidating. The lips can be heavy and, somehow, unavoidable. On this afternoon, Alex succeeded (for once) in talking me into waves above my head. Literally and figuratively. At first, the waves were breaking at about the pier’s halfway mark. The pier is 1,296 feet long (17th longest in California). The longer we sat there, the further out the break moved. Within an hour, big sets were cracking at the end of the pier, and the smaller, unbroken ones left my stomach at their peaks as they rolled past. I hadn’t caught a single wave and I didn’t want to. I called it a night and met Alex on the beach an hour later. That session will remain the greatest distance I’ll be from my surf comfort zone. Until I surf Hanalei Bay with Michael.

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Circumnavigating Part 5: Separation Anxiety

Penguin in London (less useful than in Hawaii).

I’m video chatting with Jackie and she says, “Wouldn’t it be funny if you took your board all over Europe and you didn’t have it in Hawaii?”

Yes, Jac, that would be hilarious. And I would cry. And it is a real possibility.

I arrange for a courier to retrieve my board in Pottsville and deliver it to Jon’s house in Coogee. Supposedly, it will take two days. Supposedly they will pick it up tomorrow. At the end of tomorrow, Rita texts to inform me that nobody came for the board. I call the company from Canberra and they say, “Well, let me just call the driver and get back to you in a few minutes.”

An hour later, as their office is about to close, I still haven’t heard back. When I call, I ask for Mike (the guy I talked to before) and the woman says, “Ah yes, I think he mentioned you.”

Superb.

“Let me check if it was picked up,” says entirely unhelpful Mike.

“I can tell you that it wasn’t.”

“Yes, the driver said he didn’t have time and it will definitely be picked up tomorrow.”

“Okay, great thank you.”

The following day, I have a very similar conversation.

Like four days later, I’m in Sydney and leaving the country very, very soon. I have talked to the shipping company countless times in the last week and a half. I’m finallllyyy notified that the board will be in Coogee on April 5th. My flight to Kauai is on the 6th; if I fuck this up, I really won’t have a board in Hawaii.

As it’s a weekday, both Jon and Danny are working. I no longer have keys to the apartment. Furthermore, I have no idea what time to expect this delivery, and I definitely have to sign for it. How could I possibly botch this?

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Few Fall Sessions

Another epic Raia-Struck collab…

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