accent | Water, Water Everywhere And Not A Drop To Drink

“Yoga shmoga.”

The thing with tequila is, deciding that it’s the proper course of action is always preceded by consuming copious amounts of other, less rambunctious spirits. And the other thing with tequila is, it’s never, actually, the proper course of action. But leave it to 18-year-old guys from California to convince you otherwise.

Thus, I find myself at Anomali with the biggest and most delicious iced coffee that they’ve probably ever served, feeling like a criminal in a town full of temple bodies. And actual temples.

This story really begins with clean eating. And “detoxifying.” A loosely laid plan that was swiftly abandoned at the utterance of “balcony with pillows.” Or maybe it was “wine.” It was Sunday, after all. And I reasoned that the most enlightened humans in history surely reached that state under the watch of some Bacchus variant. No? Continue reading →

When Manners Go Awry

People have been asking me if I’m Canadian.

I don’t say “aboot” or “eh” (very much). That aside, our accents are similar, so I was thinking this was a fair guess.

It’s sort of vital for us “morally indefensible” hustlers (journalists) to be able to put people at ease. I’m decent at making people think I:

a. want to hear their thoughts

b. won’t judge them.

These are mostly true. As a result, strangers ask to join me for meals. They also seem to feel they can confide in me. You’re wondering what this has to do with me being Canadian, eh?

Well, my receptive and amicable demeanor has apparently encouraged a handful of recent acquaintances to reveal that they already suspected I was American; they only asked if I was Canadian(not American) to avoid offending me, on the off-chance that I was, in fact, Canadian. Does anyone else see a discrepancy here?

Water, Water Everywhere And Not A Drop To Drink

Hijinks On The High Seas… And Beyond

Tag Archives: accent

“Yoga shmoga.”

When Manners Go Awry